<Robert Floyd walks down the aisle with crowd hissing and booing>
J. Gomez <via PA>: In the blue corner, he played the streetsmart, merged alternate "Mallory"....ROBERT FLOYD!
<Robert waves to the crowd but gets hits by multiple glass bottles, thrown by a large crowd of JOC Fanatics>
Woman <holding a "We Want Jerry" banner>: DIE, FOGBOY!
<Then the stadium was filled with fireworks and bright lights, and smoke starts to fill the red isle>
J. Gomez: And in the red corner... he's played the young genius Quinn Mallory on Sliders, his latest release is the smash hit "Mission to Mars" and, oh - don't forget "Stand By Me".......JERRY O'CONNELL!
<Soon everyone was in an uproar as Jerry walked down the isle. And before he steps into the ring, Jerry takes his shirt off>
N. Diamond: Oh my God! The JOC crowd is forming a giant pool of drool. If this doesn't stop soon, we may have a moat on our hands.
J. Gomez: Oh my. Well tonight, we have a very special guest with us in the booth. He has been with Sliders since day one, Cleavant Derricks!
CD: Hi everybody!
<A mixture of cheers and "Cryin' Man rules" were heard>
J. Gomez: So Cleavant, you have any opinions on our two celebrity gladiators?
Cleavant Derricks: Well, all I can say that I have really enjoyed working with these two.
J. Gomez: Any speculation on who will win?
<and with that, Jerry frowns as he enters the ring>
Mills Lane: OK, I don't condone any merging nor sliding out prematurely, all I want a nice clean fight! Now, LET'S GET IT ON!
JOC: I'm going to wipe the floor with your ass, Fog Boy. You made my ex-show look bad.
R. Floyd: You shouldn't talk! I've seen Season 3 and 4! Judging by YOUR acting, I thought you were a piece of cardboard!
<JOC makes a hard jab to Rob's face, and continues pummelling him>
N. Diamond: Wow, it seems that Robert's strategy of breaking down Jerry's ego has ended in no result.
J. Gomez: It seems that Jerry's experience in Hollywood has made his cockiness indestructible.
<Robert reaches into his coat pocket, pulls out something, and holds it in Jerry's face>
Rob: Have a look, Jerry.
J. Gomez: Oh my God! Is that...
Jerry: NO, NO, THAT'S NOT ME! ...I mean that WAS me...I mean...
<Rob delivers a hard blow to Jerry's head.>
C. Derricks: Whoa!
J. Gomez: What a turnaround! It seems that Robert has gained the upper hand.
<Jerry breaks away from Robert's pummeling and grabs a wooden plank from the side of the ring.>
JOC: Hey Rob! Here's a little trick I learned in "Stoker".
C. Derricks: Hey, I thought he used a stake in "Stoker"...
<with Robert still stunned by the blow, Jerry reaches in Rob's coat pocket, pulling out the Egyptian Timer>
JOC: YOU ARE NOT WORTHY OF HOLDING THIS!
<And with that, Jerry shoves the timer up Robert's ass.>
C. Derricks: Dear Lord!
JOC: 5...4...3...2...1...BYE FOGBOY!
Mills Lane: And the winner is... JERRY O'CONNELL!!!
N. Diamond: It looks like Jerry remains victorious and Robert has just slid into the Great Beyond.
C. Derricks: Nice job, Jerry!
JOC: Don't say anything to me. Now every Sliders fan loves you just because you stuck to this hell a little longer than I have. I'm a little baffled that everyone would like an old fart over a up and coming Hollywood heartthrob.
C. Derricks: What in the hell has gotten into you boy?
IiiIIIiiii Got TEEEeeeeaaAAaaarrrRSsssss in my FRRRRrooOOoooo....FooooOOOOrrrrr LuvIIIiiiinn' Yooououuuu SooOOOOoooo.....
<suddenly security officers grabbed JOC and escorted him out the stadium>
JOC: Hey, let GO of me, do you know who I AM...DO YOU...
N. Diamond: Well, Jerry may have won the fight, but he must have lost some loyal fans after that stunt.
J. Gomez: Sorry about that, Mr. Derricks.
C. Derricks: Hey, that's all right man. I don't like to hold grudges.
J. Gomez: Stay tuned for our next bout with Kari Wuhrer versus Sabrina Lloyd...when Celebrity Deathmatch continues...
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