[ EARTH 69 ]

Episodes 2.12 & 2.13 | The Web & The Net

    Peckinpah was intrigued by a money-saving stunt pulled on the Canadian sci-fi series "Lexx." They produced two episodes for the price of one, by reusing the first ep's footage along with a few new scenes that gave the same events a different spin.

    Furthermore, the two shows' plots were ripe for the Pecking. They involved mind-controlling parasites that stick out of people's mouths and make them sound like Louis Armstrong on speed.

    You can probably guess what Peck decided to do. That's right, he took the two "Lexx" episodes, replaced the first couple minutes with the "Sliders" theme song, and aired them as is. A bitterly fought lawsuit ensued.

    The producers of "Lexx," who jokingly call themselves the "Supreme Beans," dubbed Mr. Peckinpah the "Supreme Wiener."

Episodes 2.14 | Obsexion

    When lightning strikes the vortex on a world of constant rain, the foursome are redirected to the small Colorado mountain town of South Park. Oh, right, and the entire Earth they land on is inexplicably turned two-dimensional. (Actually, becoming two-dimensional would be a step up for these characters, but I digress...)

    On this "flat" world, the culinary arts gained public esteem after President John Wilkes Booth's cook saved him from assassination at the hands of Norman Schwarzkopf. (This is Peck's idea of a cross-cultural reference.) The leader of the free world is now the Prime Chef (special guest voice Isaac Hayes), who lies near death at his estate in South Park. Urged by advisors to choose a successor, the Chef picks young Eric Cartman.

    Upon gaining absolute power, Cartman decides to kidnap Maggie and force her to marry him. Maggie, of course, considers the notion of marrying an eight-year-old boy disgusting, since they would be unable to fit into each others' clothes at bondage parties.

    During the startling denouement, Kenny is dehooded and revealed to actually be a blonde girl. In the resulting carnage (Dead Blonde Count: five), the Sliders are able to free Maggie.

    However, before they can escape, they are confronted by two identical Cartmans and must for some reason figure out which is which. Quinn speculates that one of them may be from "some sort of alternate universe," to which Maggie replies that the concept of "so-called other universes" is "stupid and completely unbelievable." That scene was intended as an "homage" to a similar South Park episode, which unbeknownst to Peck was in turn a parody of Sliders.

    Peckinpah was outraged when he learned that rather than the computer effects used to create South Park's low-tech cardboard look, actual cardboard had been used. "CARDBOARD?!!" he exploded. "You think we have the money for CARDBOARD!?!!"

    A subplot involves a battle with yet more rock 'n' roll vampires, which leads Hayes' character to sing:

    Say, everybody have you seen my stake
    It's long and wooden and brown,
    If you ever need to kill a vampire
    Just take my stake and drive it down;
    Drive down my long brown wooden stake,
    Put it in your-


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